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The struggle to get on the same page when you each want different things is something that prevents many couples moving forward with their wished for home improvements.

There is a simple solution to this.

The answer is that you don't have to agree on everything.

To start with there is only one thing that you have to agree.

The one thing is that one or both of you is not satisfied with your home as it is, so you both want to resolve that in some way.

You do not have to agree on the solution yet.

Eventually you will have to agree on the solution, but when you have a joint vision in place it will be much easier

The thing is that you are both individuals with different needs, wants, lifestyles, dreams.

As well as being a couple with joint needs, etc.

As well as possibly also being parents, part of a wider family and friends network.

All of these different aspects of each of you separately and together need to be taken into account.

Once both of you feel like both of your needs and wishes will be met, then it will be easier to reach agreement.

The struggle to agree is often part of a power struggle and the person who wins the argument gets what they want in their home, while the other has an uncomfortable compromise and is left dissatisfied.

This doesn't need to happen.

In your home you are both important and your home must support each of you to live as you wish as individuals, a couple, parents, etc.

Most Importantly!

I encourage you to not worry about figuring out a solution until you have a vision in place for your home.

When you start by trying to figure out the solution before you've really got the problem fully clarified then it's very easy to get fixated and stuck. This is when you can each have ideas that are only based on your individual personal preference rather than being fully grounded in a joint vision.

I understand that it seems like the natural and right place to start - get out the floor plans and try to figure out where and how much to extend.

But it is essential to really dig down into all the analysis and evaluation of your life and gather all the information first. 

This is where this programme comes in.

Lesson Activity

Answer the questions below together.

1. Is one or both of you dissatisfied with your home right now, and wants to make changes? Yes / No

2. Do you both agree that you want to find out what you each need and want so you can change your home together? Yes/ No

If you can answer Yes to both of these questions then you'll be able to create a joint vision and create a home that you are both happy with.

If no then this programme is not for you!